I cant believe that it is already Mid August! Feels like the kids and I just got here, but we have been here for 3 months. Things i had planned to do while we were here is left undone, and it leaves me speechless as to where the hell the days go! Time goes so quickly and its gone before you realize. It was just May, and now summer is almost over, and fall is in the air. The kids and I are soon to be packing, before we know it that day will be here! A day that will be very much bitter sweet. I know I have yet to see a lot of you. Seems like im in my own world over here. I know that i keep to myself. Its hard to go for 3 years without anyone around, you just get used to that lifestyle. I know i use that as a crutch or an excuse, i just need to get my ass out and about.
So this week has been quite the week already. I applied for housing and i have yet to hear back. And My friend Kristin has been keeping an eye out for a good deal on a rental house for us, out in virginia beach. she found this ad on craigslist. So i emailed and replied to the add. It was a 4 bedroom 2.5 bath, beautiful house in a wonderful neighborhood. One of those "too good to be true" deals. The rent was only 1000 a month (which is amazing for the area)..... so they sent me an email application and right away I was "accepted". without previous rental history and all the bells and whistles. They said they were sending the keys to me within 24 hours and they were ready to give me the information to send my first months rent and deposit. RED FLAG! first of all i hadnt seen the place, they havent done a background check or anything like that, it just was VERY fishy. I've never known a landlord to rent a house without atleast meeting the persons first. And you dont pay until you sign the lease. So i went with my gut and wrote them back and told them a lie of "we found a place, we just got confirmation today"..... please disreguard all previous information given. I havent heard back from them since, and it just didnt sit well with me. SO i did some searching. Their craigslist post had been flagged already, so it was a SCAM. they were going to take all my money. good thing my gut told me not to go through with anything. I cut it off in time. I could be broke right now. Broker than i already Am...hahaa. Goes to show how being nieve can get you in some fishy situations. SO, no more craigslisting for me. well for houses anyways ;).
Can you believe that my oldest baby is going to be 4 in 8 days?! Great balls of fire!!! It seems like i was just holding him while he cooed and nibbled on his bottle. How can he already be 4? Hes turing into a little man and his looks are changing Immensely. He's finally getting some height..... phew! He's been going through this phase that he thinks its a good thing to growl at me when he's mad. Um nope, not going to Fly Mr! Find a different outlet other than growling!
Keni is growing big. Shes a little barney. I couldnt have more complete opposite children. Slades so laid back, where as keni is uptight. Slade is mild manored, where keni is outspoken (yes even at 1). Slade has patience (for the most part) Keni, Not a chance, what the hell is patience?! Slade is small and meek, keni is beefy and tough. The rougher you play with her, the more she laughs. They fight a lot, and keni will wrestle the hell out of sladen. She does things she knows will piss slade off, just to get a rise out of him. Yes, i have my hands full, i cringe thinking of teen years.
This weekend is my scentsy party. It is 11 am - 2 pm. its an open house so its come and go as you please. I will have some snacks and it will be a great time.
The following weekend is slades "rawring 4th birthday party!"..... its at the county park, there will be swimming, playing at the play ground, cake of course, a pinatta at his request, its going to be a really great time. Im looking forward to it. He sure deserves a special day. He's been great since brian has been gone. He listens to his daddy and he is the "man of the house". He helps momma when he can. Doesnt mean he hasnt given me a run for my money with his attitude, but we are all trying to cope and deal. I say we are doing pretty darn good.
This expirience is really making me grow. Ive felt myself evolve a little bit. When brians around, i tend to lean on him, i become less independent and more dependent. When something needs fixed, or slade needs something built or put together, the words "just wait until your daddy comes home, he will help you" just blurt out of my mouth, where as here, its all momma. I have proudly built 3 rescue machines out of legos (with directions)! I have attempted however I couldnt complete, the transformer, but i gave it my best shot! I have done alot that makes me step back and say to myself "go you!". I think when you are in a marriage and parenting you kind of lose yourself and you kind of morph together. Its a bit of a shock at first to be seperated, but now i see the things i could have done before. SUch as outtings. I would wait to take the kids somewhere so that i would have brian there not only to "do things as a family" but to have an extra set of hands. Now i just go. not because i have no choice, but because i want to. its very empowering. Im finding myself, and i am loving what and who i am seeing. Im not the only one who is changing, Brian is changing as well. He has always been and amazing man, flawed (as we all are), but amazing.... but even more so now. He is taking this time away from the kids and I, and he is using every tool to reflect and remain close to us. He is reading books to better us and keep us strong, he is taking classes and going to church! Im So proud of him and the decisions he is making. He is no longer looking out for just himself, hes looking out for US. We've made a lot of mistakes in the past, but we are living from them, and to watch him give up his dream of becoming a commercial pilot, to help me have my own career brings me to tears. Is it only for me? No, of course not. But was he thinking of me when he made that decision? Of course.And that is one of many ways he truely is amazing. Many of you know brian very well, be proud of him, be very proud of him because he is simply amazing. He is a wonderful Man and father.
Well that is all for now. I have two fighting kids on my hands. both of which are wearing tutu's and riding cars.
Have a wonderful rest of the week and weekend!
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